Sometimes, it is hard to imagine about a world without anyone surrounding you but sometimes you could only imagine why is there not anyone around? Some people say that it depends on your own imaginations, as how you prefer it to be. However, is it possible to think of something that isn't even there? I can't answer that, because I keep questioning myself over that question.

I've been through a lot lately, and of all the events which stroke me, I just could not find anyone to share them with. Friends? Why would I not seek them when they're all I have besides my family? But it's not that I've never tried. I've tried everything I was ever able to, to please them. But most of the times, they choose someone else over me.

Every single time I think about this, I would ask myself "don't I worth a thing?" I know I do, but how am I supposed to show it? I am leading through a normal life. I make myself feel who I really am. It's only sometimes, I just couldn't find anyone around for me to talk to.

Everyday of my life, I tend to realize one thing which I keep whispering inside of myself not to believe, that everyone is better than me. I've had close friends before. But as time flies through, other people take them away from me with their own special attractions. As for me, what do I have to attract new ones? My words? My poems? Not much even bothers to look. Most of the people I know keep telling the people they know that I'm a freak. It's just because I love to write, it makes me different from how most of their friends are. Is it my fault that this occurs?

Now, some friends who have been really nice to me, wouldn't even bother to reply me, be it on the phone or on the net. And some of the new friends I try to make, thinks I'm too much. And the reason is, I gave them a piece of paper written with my poems and a bunch of words of happiness.

Tell me please. What have gone wrong? Am I invaluable? At least I know I'm not to myself. But what? What did I miss to deserve to lose everyone I ever cared about? At least most of them. If it was not my best, then what was it? I know it's wrong to feel this way, but it keeps crossing through my mind. Sometimes I just could not help myself. I really wish I'd find my path soon. Very soon.